离开的第三天

今天是离开的第三天也是上班第一天。

我看见老人家，突然想起了他。很多老人家，好像每个都是他。

感觉……酸痛、以为是、期待、恐怖……

我好后悔，也无助，因为已没有机会了。

脑海里浮现他的回忆，甜美带酸。

好像在听到他的声音。

外公过世了

外公过身了。

星期日，傍晚七时。

我的手提电话响，是表弟的来电，我接了。

我听见婆婆的声音，她告诉我说“快点回家乡，因为公公不能了”。我呆了会儿，我说“好”。之后，我就接到妈妈传给我的短讯，“急事，请回电”。我呼叫，然后就回去了。

途中，有好多东西在我的脑海不断地重复。我不敢去多想，也不想去理会。我知道逃避不是解决的方法，但是我无选择。很快地到达了家，然后就去冲凉。收拾了几件衣服就开车同和爸爸一起回家乡。

回家乡的途中，都如什么事也没发生。

回到家后，我很害怕，我害怕面对，我不能接受事实。我慢慢的走进屋里，看见公公躺在床上，心很酸疼。我做不了什么。他躺在病床上，更瘦了，瘦得……让人见到心就揪住。

我说：“公公，公公，我回来了”。我看见他一口一口的呼吸，不能说话的样子。这一幕幕的场景， 只让我的心痛更痛，痛进心里。我们不断地说话给他听，看见他的嘴巴，好像说了些东西，可是却听不到。看见他的眼睛有泪光，他不舍得，我们也是。

我抵达家乡是十一点十五分(11:15pm)左右，半个小时之后他就离世了。十一点四十分(11:40pm)左右，他的一口一口的呼吸停顿了。在他断气的之前，他上身颤抖了一会儿和大大呼吸。看见他第一次和第二次做完之后，就断气了。

婆婆、他的儿子女儿、孙（表弟）和外孙（我），一起送他最后的路程。两个孙（表哥、表姐），还在巴士上从新加坡回着来。

从此这一刻，一切会改变。

然后，我们就开始准备工作为公公整理房间等等工作。

It's time to say goodbye. I'm so upset, because i should have done more than I could provide, I should be visit you more frequent as possible, should get the foods that you like and could get from your place.

I remember the day you brought me together with you to rubber plantation to help you, catch cockroach to feed the birds, catch birds, went to lake side gathered water into the bucket where house has no water.

You asked me help you, I alway did. We did things together, I hope we remember these as part of our journey and memory, and time we spent together. I will never forget all we had gone through.

You are hardworking, patient, loving and soft-spoken. Love everyone. You never beaten me, that is something very special about you. You collected many memories in your room. You appreciate every single things we gave and I can see from happy face. I felt very warmed when i saw it. But I never really give you something that even such a little things to make you happy. A little that i gave, i know is not enough for so many years.

You alway told me, don't waste. Things are valueless, you still keep it like a treasure. And now, i know what it mean. I miss a point and i understand now. Just like you, you are something that money can't buy. I should treasure you. Should treat you good. Now you are left, I am so regretted.

From this moment, my life never be the same. I will not forget you because you are someone special to me. You are no.1 in my life.

I hope you found a comfort place, and rest in peace.

Hope will see you in future. 

Kindergarden->School->College

15+ years of schooling and colleging has been past. As I was looking back, time is ticking really thrilling fast.

2 yrs of kindegarden. Graduated in a small village. Grandmom & Grandpa alway accopany me to kindegarden. Didn't miss a day~ :) Thank you. My kau fu (uncle) always beaten me with rotan(I am not naughty but still kena rotan always). but he is good la... train me more guai though i oredi guai enough. :)

6 yrs of primary school. Studied in 3 different school geographically scattered including one oversea.
Never had a chance to acknowledge and thank you to a special one who is my class teacher of standard 5 & 6. She has been pouring out her heart in hoping that we will excel in our school works. Relentless pursue, never giving up for us, though we were the last class in the school. Mrs. Low. Something special needed to address about her. She has helped me to register for Secondary school on the last day of the registration openning for primary student. if not i'm schooless jok... :( (not so severe actually, maybe go some school not so good reputation only la) :)

Another 6 yrs spent in Secondary school including remove class. Enrolled in 3 different secondary schools.
I failed my Malay, needed to attend remove class. Daxx.. Supposely a bad thing, but life in that particular year was my happiest moment during my secondary school. Cycling from uptown to downtown back and fourth, crossing bridgesss, overcoming rain together with my bicycle, challeging cars and motobike with my bicycle, Cycling few km to school, lumba bicycle after school (for fun la, not real one), cyber cafe(HL, CS, Starcraft, ....), being a sandwich in the public buses... what else ar..?? I think these was what i can remember so far about my wei sui things in remove and form 1.
Form 1 to form 2 miserable yrs. 8am out from home 8pm back to house. private tuition, this no good that no good.. haiz.. sigh~~ is all over now.. yeah~~
Form 3, 4, 5. -
3 - still okay. climbing up the stair, finding the lost soul, building up network, normalising life
4 - Got 3As for my PMR, haha~~ and became a science class student. miss few months of school due to health issue. This yrs past like didn't past. no memory at all. Like database system, suddenly lost all data for that particular year.. haha~~ good example, right. hmm. ;0
5 - Catching up, working up, take and give, forgive and forgo, restoring, recovering, healing,... got 1,2,3 in class (count from behind). :) Found something and lost it now as in now loh.. ;) . :) :) What can i say, maybe life already planned... not in my controlled. Never wanted to control my destiny and fate. :) my life already planned jok geh.. wakaka~~ haha~~

Ohhhh.... again, another 4 yrs in college. ;) Yeah.. these four years are something very different because we had our own transport. i dun have la but most of my fren do. :) Tumbang their car, go north, south, east, and west. Never a day bore bore... (sometimes quite bore coz dunno go where) haha~~
nothing really special for college life la... everything remain the same like school got exam, test, and assignment.... (last time A to E and now 1-15)..... except dai gou chai/lui jok, got own transport loh(even i dun have, fren do.. haha), no tight-up schedule like school 745-1pm (more time meaning more freedom), yam cha and yam cha more often than before, last-minute assignment (1 mnths duration but most students used 1 week gao tim(complete) indirectly shown students is has the capability and capacity to fullfil assignment requirement in short period of time.), what else ar... keke~~~ dunno oooo.... one last things, college very cosy and costly. PTPTN loan helped me, if not die hard jok. :) Thank you PTPTN loan. haha~~

At this point of time I am writing this, i already worked for 1 and half month liao... Day day work, week week work, month month work, i afraid i lost my schooling and colleging memories. So better write something now... not so structure but at least i can recall back. :)

Bedtime, tomorrow need to da jiong jok (work). ;)
Good Night. May God Bless you. ;)

Up & Down

There is time where situation which is not in your area of control. You definitely feel bad about it. Nevertheless, life still have to go on.

Do not be so overwhelm by the problem which has no solution. Sometimes, solution will come to you by any mean.

Is good that you have problems. It doesn't matter how hopeless the situation be. Just carry on your life and enjoy the experience of having problems in life. It will certainly help you. It helps you to grow in maturity. Do not feel bad about yourself that other people are saying that you are naive. You know you are going through a period of difficulties, certainly you are growing in maturity.

Always ready for challenges, take it and handle it wisely and smartly.

Life is great, time won't wait. Enjoy and go on life with full of hope and confidence. :)

Lunch for three (3) person

Isn’t it that’s a lot…

Colleague [F4]

My colleague addressed that we are "F4" Malaysia version. Well... Don't we look like F4?

PLS: ZaiZai is the first on the left with black colour suit shirt. haha~~ :)

Next decade is all about Internet/Online?

The next wave in technology will be the Internet/Online. Online business (small business like comic rental store, petshop, and etc. may host online services to increase competitive advantage), online applications (office suite, anti-virus, game), cloud computing?, collaboration/integration/combination/(anything in one place) and etc.

Significant Event
Desktop sale is slowing down.
Laptop/Notebook/Netbook/Mobile Computer enjoys sale growth.
Mobile phone sale is showing sign of booming. Competition is heating up, when more competition, it also mean cheaper and more features. Like iPhone sells its product like sky-rocketing and surprisingly, Blackberry did even better.
Cloud Computing introduced last year. We dunno what is it, never mind. Web 2.0 and Web 3.0 already existed today, have u ever noticed?
Internet Giant, Google dominating the Internet market. I think Google is and will be the leader in changing the Internet/Online environment. Their products is really good, idea is reachable, influence-maker and etc.
WiMax technology introduced, pushing accessible anywhere and anytime. Internet access environment-friendly. If this success, how do u deny not to go online when everyone does.
Facebook, Twitter. Popularity??? ernomous.

What others significant do u see??? Is more than just e-commerce.

宝剑不磨要生锈，人不学习要落后

宝剑不磨要生锈，人不学习要落后

Precious sword that don't grind will rusts but a man who don't learn choose to lose out.

Old friends, old time

On the Friday, I received a strange call. She addressed her name but I hardly recall. In the conversation, I trying to clarify as much as information I could to avoid any misunderstood. Finally, I came to a realized it was an old classmate from primary school.

I'd been invited for a gathering tonight. I so much so wanted to go but I really got a planned for 2nite . I told her will be confirmed later by today.

In the night, I finished up everything and give them a call, saying that I will be coming very late and i did attended for the gathering at "Cola Cafe" at Jalan Genting Klang.

It was 6 of us who turned out. I was surprised and shocked because I really can't recall most of them. Anyhow, it is a good one finally we met up for a long long times. It's been ten (10) years, we have not had a chance but this time is really different.

All stuffs that has been stored in my memory were unearth bit by bit. It is something really got me cheer up.

Hotmail - Was hacked

Today, I came to realized that my personal email(hotmail) has been hacked.

I noticed all my contacts were deleted except one person and my email's "Vacation reply" was on.

This is the following message that was set to my "Vacation reply".

"

Dear friend:
What are u doing these days?I am going to recommend a Eshop to you.Yesterday I found a web of a large trading company from China,which is an agent of all the well-known digital product factories,and facing to both wholesalers,retailsalers,and personal customer all over the world. They export all kinds of digital products and offer really competitive and reasonable price and high quality goods for their clients,so i think you will make a big profit if you did business with them.And they promise they will provide the best after-sales-service.If you are interested to do business with them,in my opinion, you can make a trial order to test that.
Their Web address: www.purchase-online365.com

Regards!

"

How was this happened?

Sigh~~ First time was been hacked.

Susan Boyle's Life Lesson

...Britain's Got Talent TV show has made mention of phrases like "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" or "You can't judge a book by its cover." (http://new.music.yahoo.com/blogs/stopthepresses/23149/susan-boyles-life-lesson/)

...Ms. Boyle has already taught all of us a valuable lesson in terms of how we as people perceive ourselves and others. (http://new.music.yahoo.com/blogs/stopthepresses/23149/susan-boyles-life-lesson/)

Of course, it's a lesson that, as per the never-ending relevance of those aforementioned cliches, always seems to be re-learned every now and then.(http://new.music.yahoo.com/blogs/stopthepresses/23149/susan-boyles-life-lesson/)

In any event, here's hoping that Susan Boyle's story helps all of us to try and keep from forming opinions about people based solely on their appearances. As she's decidedly proven, if you give someone half a chance, you never know what you may find once you get below the surface. (http://new.music.yahoo.com/blogs/stopthepresses/23149/susan-boyles-life-lesson/)

---

I found this story very interesting. I taken it down to share with you and at the same time I would like to bookmark this incredible story for myself.

Personal Laptop Downed

Laptop has failed to start despite it has the power light is on and is enabled to charge.

What has gone wrong for my laptop for just two and a half year.

9th Day of the Year of Chinese Lunar Calendar

It was past 12am, it is also the 9th day of the Chinese lunar calendar, and it is also a ‘big’ day for the Hokkien Lang (people). The sound of the fireworks has not been silence since 12am. I was sitting in front of the laptop hearing the so called ‘music’ playing repeatedly.

I hope that I could join them for the celebration. It looks just too tempting, the fireworks playing non-stop. :)

As time goes by which mean I am growing older, this kind of celebration is just getting less and less involve. I remember when I was a kid and a teen, I used to have a group of friends that we will meet up and go to each friend’s house, gathered with their family during Chinese New Year. In one way you may say, the purpose may not just greet but is to get more ang pow. (That’s right!!!, I totally agreed.) ;) On the other hand, I think it is good that we go to our friend’s house to gather with their family to received ‘blessing’ (ang pow), because it shown that we remembered them. and yet it is also part of our culture. :)

I miss out all the funniest thing in my teen life, time will not go backward. Therefore, I will try to available myself in the future so that I won’t miss out the fun in life as I am heading to my adulthood. :)

Cheer, life is still bright even without the funniest stuffs. :)

It is now 12.30am. The firework’s sound is dimming. :)

Final Year Student

Being a final year student, I do not see any significant changes of myself. The most noticeable changes is that I am getting more worry than before because I am getting closer to working life and yet there are more. Stressful is always but is even stressful now as there are projects and exams ahead.

What is so significant to you as a final year student?

Transformers – Revenge of the Fallen

 

Just got the news from my friend that Transformer is coming to cinema this year. :)

See.. Is on the 26.6.09. :)

Burung tahi on my head

There is a "burung" which I didn't noticed. As I walking to the mamak, suddely I felt a drop of water fell on my head. I thought it was air-cond water but then as I looked up I didn't see any air cond above. The only I saw is a bird standing there with his head inside and butt outside.

My first reaction is "Sxht"!

I believe this is the first time I "kena" "Sxht"!

What a day!!!

未来

我总是迷路了。

我有一双眼睛，能够看见所有一切的东西，不过我总是迷路了。

虽然我拥有乐观的态度去看待每一件事情，不过还是走不远，又迷路了。

迷路了的经历以及人生的不清楚道路，总是觉得越走越累。

Living in this world

Interestingly, I got this topic from my friend's MSN Live Messenger personal message.

Living in this world. It is just like the way we were on the road. We may be walking, driving, cycling, running and etc. There is one thing in common and that is we will be a time where we will stop at the cross road to make a decision whether to turn left or right.

If you know the way, u get there faster. If you don't know the way, you may get lost but end of the day you will reach there but with more effort, energy and time.

Living in this world is ... 

Expiry Date

Today is 28/9/2008.

See the picture, even though is expired a year ago. What amazed me is that is same day as today a year ago. This is not usual, because we don't encounter each day!

[book] Fish for Life

Fish For Life - A Remarkable Way to Achieve Your Dreams - Stephen C. Lundin, Ph. D., John Christensen, and Harry Paul

Just finished read this book. I could not pick up most of the points. I've to read again, and jot down some note. Hopefully to share some with you later after my second reading.